On Tuesday, I had big plans to go to Bed Bath and Beyond to buy placemats.
Aaaaaaaaand I just lost 92% of all my readers with that sentence.
Wait, no. You might be the only one left. You reading this right now. Thank you for staying with me. It's gotta be a corporal work of mercy. Visit the imprisoned, Read the readerless, Clothe the naked, Change the poopy.
Well, you're still here, so I'll keep going with my other six takes.
|I spy bacon.|
I'm going to give a big thank you to St. Anthony Abbot, the unofficial patron saint of bacon and bacon lovers, because A BACON BAR is opening in the Metropolis nearest me!
Happy Dance! Happy Dance!
Burke’s Bacon Bar is opening in late July, specializing in sandwiches that all involve bacon: strips of bacon, bacon powder, bacon dressing. I don't know who Burke is, but he is a genius.
I'll be on vacation in late July, but in August, I.am.so.there.
Last night, watching the fireworks, and the kids with their glow bracelets (best $5 spent ever) and their fancy pull-n-peel-licorice, my friend said, "I love two-year-olds."
Crazy Lady was referring to Jill, whom I also love, but it is a strong love, tempered by the trial of a two hundred plus tantrums.
Case in point, here is an excerpt from an email I sent Susan, in an effort to cheer/scare her homesickness away:
I want to tell about yesterday. J is doing this thing where she wakes up super early with me, takes a 2+ hour nap sometimes as late as 3:30-5:30 and then stays up til midnight. Dad has been on my case to make her more normal, and get her to nap less etc.Yesterday, she went down for a nap at 3 and I woke her up at 4. I was doing the dishes and I was scraping P’s left over chili in the garbage. She started yelling, “I want that!” and grabbing handfuls of chili out of the garbage. Then she was cry/yelling because I loaded the bowl and the dishwasher was running! So I had to get out a new bowl and then scrape garbage chili out of the trash for her to eat.Later, after Edmucn got called up to play in a baseball game (spur of the moment fill in for a player on vacation), I heated up a bowl of not garbage chili for him to eat on the way to the game and she insisted on carrying her bowl of garbage chili to the car. She ate it all on the way there and threw the bowl down. After I dropped him off, I stacked her dirty bowl on his and she started wailing again. She wanted the bowl back. So I gave it back to her. Now, I’m driving home and I hear the bowl hit the far window of the car and she’s wailing for me to get her bowl back and I say I can’t, because I’m driving and she yells, “I wanna hit you! C’mere!”Just another day with Jill.
I'm not whining. I've been here before, nearly always with multiples in diapers and/or pregnant. But I challenge all two-year olds to a Battle of Wills Throwdown with Jill. (You hear me, Grace?)
Jill's qualifications include screaming until BURSTING BLOOD VESSELS IN HER FACE AND VOMITING if I remove her diaper for her and assist with that in any way, and The Fury of a Thousand Burning Suns if you or any well-intentioned relative or passer-by touch her hair. Or attempt to smell it.
Her hair smells really good.
|"I can tolerate a hug, but do not touch my hair."|
If you're coming to Michigan for that Thornton Family Reunion this month, please be aware of the hair thing. She holds long grudges too. Consider yourself forewarned.
4. Do you eat food? Do you like food? Then you are officially invited to join the Mystery Ingredient Monday Fun!
This week's theme is peaches.
Our family has a phenomenal peach recipe, but my sister-blogger, Anne, says that this recipe should be off limits.
Anne blogged about white rice and mac and cheese for my much maligned Beets link up, so I don't see her in a rule-making position for a link-up that Tasha said has no rules.
You don't have to have a blog to play along. You can post a picture to Facebook, or Instagram, or Tumblr or tweet it. We're using #MIM hashtag.
You should at least check out the entries Monday, because someone might be dropping "bombs."
5. Are you literate? Duh. You'd have to be to read this.
Do you read books?
|I know this graphic needs work, but Lucy has an eye doctor appointment. Later, babes.|
Then, come join my other link-up, What We're Reading Wednesday!
Here are the rules, Charlotte:
You have to have read the book. Or at least a goodly portion of it.
You should read books! Not magazines or internet articles (sorry Mental_Floss).
The book must have been read in the recent past, like in the last week or so. Or yesterday at nap-time.
You should blog about it and link back to the WWRW link-ups. As a matter of courtesy, check out some of the other linker-uppers.
Nothing else matters. Fiction, non-fiction, classics, hot off the presses, out-of-print, board books, the Bible, the dictionary, whatever is printed and sold as a book qualifies.
WAIT! One Last Rule: Thou shalt not freak out or judge if this link-up is not up absolutely every Wednesday. I'm no Jen Fulwiler. But I'll do my best.
I grabbed the latest issue of Food Network magazine, because my good friend, Ree aka Pioneer Woman, is on the cover. Well, that, and there is gorgeous giant ear of corn wrapped in bacon.
Lo and Behold! Her Spicy Pasta Salad with Smoked Gouda, Tomatoes, and Basil recipe is in there. I saw this recipe when she first blogged about it, back in 2011. I print up a fresh copy every summer.
This year, I found Chipotle Gouda (be still my heart) at Costco which made the dish even
Never mind that we were four hours late getting there. Never mind that dessert had already been consumed and the keg was starting to float. People swarmed over that pasta salad like flies on my garbage cans.
My sister-in-law, who is also pregnant, luuuuuved it. She said, and I quote, "The sweetness of the basil pairs perfectly with the heat." She also said, "You HAVE to make in this in Michigan!" To which I replied, "Random Nephew, Go get me another beer."
7. Silly YouTube video of the week: The Lumineers "Hey Ho" with Back-up singer, Harry Caray.
Have a fabulous weekend and go see the great and powerful Jen for more.